I'm irritable today. Venting:
1. Thanksgiving is SUCH a pain in the ass. Every year, my mom threatens to bowl the turkey down the driveway because she hates everything and everyone on that day, and then the rest of us catch it and hate each other. Conversation revolves around NOT triggering turkey-bowling, until someone brings up politics and religion, and someone always does, and I am usually the only person in the room with different views so I get the joy of feeling attacked while pouring gravy. If you haven't had this experience, I highly recommend it. It's great.
2. I made the mistake, in an effort to "include" family, of telling them the Cyclist and I went on a bike ride.
A BIKE ride, mind you, not a romantic date with roses, right? But idiot me sent a picture as proof: the cyclist and I looking ratty and worn, on top of a wooden overlook in some nature preserve. I have my arm extended with my shitty phone camera and we are attempting weak smiles. The bags under my eyes are so dark it looks like I have black eyes and so I am attempting to hide this by angling my face slightly towards him.
My mom replied: "OMG YOU ARE CRAZY ABOUT HIM, ADMIT IT!!! I SEE YOUR FACE!! YOU LOOK SO HAPPY."
IT'S BEEN 2.5 MONTHS. Yes, I like him. I would like him a lot more if he made eye contact and seemed to like me back so please do not start shopping for the mother-in-law dress. We are still working on the getting-to-know-eachother part. I do not need the pressure of frenzied, hopeful exclamations to ward off Old Maid syndrome. And YES I just happen to look happy when I smile. It's a signal genetically honed in humans for millions of years: bare your teeth and no one attacks.
It's going to be a blast when I get to tell her it's over.
Oh and they JUST invited me to bring him for Thanksgiving. That wouldn't be awkward at all, nope. "Dinner isn't awful enough, why don't you bring the guy you like so we can alienate him before he likes you too much to run away?" RIGHT?
3. So, since I brought it up, I do like him. A lot. I will reserve the "crazy" label for a point that feels appropriate, like mutual feelings.
4. VENUS WILL BE IN MY HOUSE OF TRUE LOVE the entire time I am going to be completely unfucking available and traveling the entire next month. Fuck! Or whatever the hell planet will assist with my total and true happiness forever. I'm doomed. Clearly! And don't say, "oh you will meet him on your travels!" because I'm going to be sitting on 40 acres of farmland in a cabin alone with only horses and rabbits outside for some of that time. It can't get any less likely to happen before New Year's, I'm just saying.