So yesterday, I introduced the artist to my mom and 5 minutes later he told her a story involving the statement "...back when I drank like a fish!" Great. Now she thinks I am dating an alcoholic.
The story about his friend's bullwhip fetish didn't go over so well either.
My mom's eyes widenened and I could literally SEE her picturing me swinging from chandeliers (to dry the wax on my nipples of course) while begging for a light flogging on my nether regions.
(Not that there's anything WRONG with the above scenario for two willing participants, just... do I really want to see it playing on my mom's corneas like a bad porn flick? Her daughter, the unwitting star? Dear god.)
After some other situationally-inappropriate stories, she cornered me in the kitchen and grabbed my shoulders. "OMG ASPLENIA, DO NOT MARRY HIM. He's a nice guy and all but zOMG DON'T!"
Now, my mom doesn't always have the best sense of timing. (Hello? We are only dating 3 months?) Or tact. She seems to feel most alive when topics get controversial. She can be a pretty difficult person, to put it mildly. But her words grated on me.
I don't like to admit this but there ARE flags.
I don't write about them so much because I like to concentrate on the positives but they're there. I almost ended things tonight, for example, because it's my time of the month and I feel like making my life SUCK even more then it already does. And that was even before the ALL CAPS ZOMG email I'm expecting from my mom, reinforcing her "you're going to ruin your life!" pronouncement. I am struggling enough withOUT her negative feedback. Although, being a soon-to-be-divorcee, I should be all my life is already ruined, lala, I can do what I want!
So really, why am I getting stressed?
The artist is still surprisingly patient. We've talked about everything completely openly. He's not scared off by my flags, my difficult mom, or her warnings but maybe that's what years of alcohol and bullwhips do.