Me: So, I dunno, I'm just not really drawn to his company.
My mom: Well, sex isn't the most important part of a relationship.
Me (spitting out drink): SEX?? We haven't even held HANDS. I'm talking about as FRIENDS. I don't really even want to hang out as friends.
My mom (realizing she misread): Oh, okay. Well you can't force those things. But men who are kind and thoughtful make good husbands.
Me: It's too bad it's not possible to make the feelings grow.
(Well maybe you can -- arranged marriages, anyone?)