Wednesday, August 7, 2013


I have this conversation with someone at least once a week:
"Be patient, if you want abs, doing 50 situps today won't get you ripped by tomorrow. You just have to keep DOING it. Perseverance is key. Whatever you turn your attention to is the thing that will blossom."
I looked over at this blog and can see I spent much time underwater.

In the past year, the divorce finalized (well a little over a year), had a family medical crisis and a personal one and a lot was getting me down.

I don't want to be there anymore.

I'm clearing the cobwebs out of my head and my blog (you may have noticed) and moving forward. I want to focus my attention a little more positively. I don't want to mull over things that haven't worked but instead turn my attention to better things.

Like, here are some positives:
-- I'm getting enough sleep, yay! Regularly! I don't use an alarm clock anymore. I haven't in forever. I just go to bed 8 hours before I have to get up (6am) and it works out. This requires some prep though. I try to turn off the computer around 9 and start unwinding. If I'm really good about this, I'm in bed reading by 9:30.

-- I'm eating healthy! That usually comes easy though, I'm one of these weird people that craves veggies. It's the sweet tooth that I struggle with. So I have a way around it: moderation. I tried going cold turkey but that didn't work. I signed up for some diet newsletter and then read a book on cravings and even checked out the paleo thing. I spent all this time looking into stuff and none of it was realistic for me. Basically I just need to *prepare* to be healthy. I only have one rule: when faced with a choice, try to make it a good one. It's a surprisingly simple but effective concept. I sneak a chocolate mousse yogurt (Yoplait Whips rock) in the afternoon and allow myself a small portion of another treat if I must. No guilt, just don't go overboard.

-- I'm back down to my pre-med crisis weight! And I have more stamina. I feel pretty awesome physically which is makes it easier to work harder. Dudes, when you get out of shape, do you know how freaking HARD it is just to get back to baseline? Extra fat is more than just weight, it's more vasculature for your blood to pump through before it gets back to your heart, not to mention more tissue for your body maintain. I *felt* heavier on my feet too, which made it harder to run, which is completely demotivating to movement but if you keep at it anyway, you get past that hump and it starts getting easier.

-- Been meditating almost every night. I do this special 5-10 minute meditation exercise before I go to sleep and it's incredibly relaxing. It feels absolutely delicious to crawl into bed. Oh, and next week I'm signed up for a meditation workshop.

-- My digs are clean and nice, but that's easy for me too, I've never really been a slob.

-- Been traveling and seeing family and friends. That's not new either, but it is positive.

-- Meeting some nice men. One is starting to stand out because of the nice rapport we are developing in writing. (We already met once and had a nice date. Both of us were a little shy but it went well.)
Hey a whole blog post dedicated to what's going well. I feel the urge to self-deprecate or mope. Writing about good things is boring!


  1. Any boredom you feel writing this is offset by the big grin I have reading it.

  2. Ooh, what kind of meditation do you do? I've been trying to get into the habit but failing miserably.

  3. Aww thx ElGuap!

    KT, the meditation isn't typical but I fell into it by accidental discovery. You close your eyes and watch your eyelids. Watch everything. Just observe. Thoughts come and go, memories, conversations... don't fight or resist or engage or relive, just watch like you're watching a movie. Let it appear into the main focus and then drift away to be replaced by the next thing. It will almost feel like you're in REM sleep because so much is flashing but it will start to slow, and when it slows to a crawl and eventually stops, you know you're "done." I usually fall into the nicest, most relaxing sleep from this.

    Sometimes when I'm having a stressful day at work, I put my head in my hands to make it dark and I do this for a few minutes and I emerge feeling very relaxed and rejuvenated.

    BTW when I do this at night, I put a cloth over my eyes because I cannot be distracted by outside light. Also I put on a fan so there's white noise and I am not distracted by outside sounds.